shut up and DANCE!

i'm thinking i should be...............

Disturbia type-character (rihanna's video)

sailor

pokemon

barbie

alice in wonderland

 

suggestions?

 

yeah, i know.  i'm just some goddamn idiot.

 

but i'm over it.

over them, over their jackass friends, over trying.

my real friends will be gone in 8 months anyway.

it seems like this year is going to be "let's try to screw Emma over in every way possible" year. first, one of my best friends ditches me and all my other friends to "step up his relationship with God" and he "doesn't approve of our lifestyle choices" just because almost all of my other friends are gay! he's been in and out of the closet himself. and i don't even know why he won't talk to me, because it can't be because of my sexuality, since i'm straight. probably because i hang out with them. next, my principal won't let me dual enroll so i can take most courses online becuase of a health problem, even though almost every other school in kansas does. kids have literally been calling me a "freak" in class. my dad is coming back sunday, and i can never make the cut. TAI's new album is not good (yeah, i said it. put THAT in your juicebox and suck it) and i am about to lash out on this stupid little freshman who is a total elitest.

 

UGHHHHH.

 

thanks for reading. know you read it makes me feel a bit better.

A journal about nothing. how original.

i would love to be exploding with some amazing news, but it's kansas. give me break.

to keep it short, my mother seems to think i have some athletic gift hidden deep inside me and is trying to pry it out. which is somewhat sad, because if she remembers my childhood, she would remember the gruesome and sad stories of when she was trying to pry it out then. and both times, she got an clumsy and sad excuse of an athlete.

 so now i'm thinking of how i'm going to stop her from trying to make me join a sports team.

hmm. that's about all. school starts in 16 days x(

 

and some advice:

don't obsess over a drunk.

i'll share it with you this way :)

seriously shook me. i knew he was going through tough times, but i didn't think he would try to resort to suicide- i thought he had more of a sense not to? strange. anyway, for more info(as long as you have a myspace) follow the link:

 

http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendID=9630420&blogID=417856083

looking back at last year really brought me down. it was a year of fighting and hating for no reason. it was hard to find someone who would even accept me. the closest i got was a girl who liked me because i was there for her even when she didn't know my name. the rest of them just give me a little smile as if i wasn't worth their time. i rarely speak, i just listen. there isn't much to hear but the words of a hypocrite. hating your girlfriend because she won't buy you weed anymore. they tell me i stereotype but they're all the same. they all fit into the mold without a problem. this year i'm not taking their shit. they treated me like dirt and now i'm over them. it's not worth their approval. i didn't really have any sprouting friendships. most spiraled because i realised it was better to go the road alone then be treated that way. i have found a small group that so far have been good to me. feeling like you belong is the best feeling in the world. it's just like crab fishing seasons on the bering sea. sometimes you win, sometimes you lose.

i still know i'm in the trunk with most of my friends, but when they want me back, i won't take them back. i don't give second chances to people who forget me.

what goes around comes around, and it's my time now.

 

i love the whole world, and all it's sights and sounds.

concerning ebay. it's not a technical question, just your opinion:

do you think it's worth it to sell clothing on ebay? not used clothing, but clothing that you've never worn. my neighbor does this all the time and loves it. what are your ebay selling experiences?

yaaaaay! cake!

so i'm using my gran's mac and it really sucks =/ so i haven't been updating. but once we go to london, i'll try harder x3

who else is super excited for the new BATMAN MOVIE? i've been a batman freak since i watched one of the old movies when i was 9 or so. i was gonna go to the midnight showing, but we'll be driving back from canada. ho hum.

but my mum got me this cool metal bag with birds all over it. and an bracelet shaped like an alligator! i'll put up some pics sooner or later hahaa

but how have you all been doing?

just as i start to relax everything gets busy again!

leaving for canada on tuesday, planning to steal the laptop from my dad x3 he leaves for Paraguay on the 25th, the day before Laura's (my lovely next door neighbor) wedding! it's been a very busy summer so far!

also, JT + Madonna = super cool music!

 

it was good. probably better than last year aswell.

pics up sooon! (very few, btw. mainly TAI.)

are a lot more ghetto then i imagined. i normally avoid them for that reason, but i find myself wandering for a read every once and a while, and boy, i just find most of them so trashy! kind of harsh, but it's all i ever seem to find. if you know some good chat boards where you can carry a good conversation, be sure to let me know. anyway, for your own pure enjoyment, i have found this picture on photobucket:

can i get an LOL?

tokio hotel overload. x_x they played some show round here yesterday. fangirls EVERYWHERE. i love Simira- "they are so horrible! i cannot stand them, especially Bill, everyone is like 'Oh! Oh! i want to have your baby Bill!' it is just so stupid!" hahah probably the only german i know that doesn't like them.

home tomorrow real late!

new obsession: KATY PERRY!

whew. wiped out.

i can rarely get on now! so i try to update stuff as often as possible. but what i want to know is how all of YOU are doing! feel free to share. PS-never take an overnight train. their kitchen caught on on fire this morning and they had to rush in and use the fire extinguiser in our compartment -_-

 

:)

no joke. yet when i try to get a tan it turns around and kicks me in the bum i'm still paler than the white curtains here. dream vacation pt 1 has been going well, the hotel lounge we're sitting in has an awesome view of the Giza pyramids- light show tonight, i'll post photos soon. it's so scary out there- the drivers must be literally insane. they're crazier than a stuntman, yet no one hits each other. and everyone is either speaking arabic, italian, or german- tourist land much? haha we went to the museum where you can see king tut's golden mask & other belongings- in a few days i'll see his real mummy-fied head! totally excited for that. the pool is big, i need to work out more >.<  there's a  place here called City Of The Dead- it's where poverty-stricken citizens live-and they live in the cemeteries. i want to get a closer look, but our tour guide just calls me crazy and continues on. but otherwise, i think i'm waay too dehydrated-i got jiggy to Britney Spears in traffic while my parents and our egyptian friend got train tickets-her husband doesn't know any english and was instructed to watch me&the car. it was fun. every woman is dressed head-to-toe, but that doesn't stop them from being as glamorous and feminine as possible :) everything is waay in chaos and havoc.

 

i need sleep!

So my friends Bug, Taylor, and Chase decided to kidnap me around 9:30 tonight. So we went to wal-mart, played in the tubs filled with pillows & tried to lock each other in them, then we around trying to find a red light so we could chinese fire drill. we did eventually, it was fun. then we went to braums and got ice cream. yummmmmm. then when i went to say goodbye to Bug, Taylor thought it would be funny to start reversing so my face would slam into her mirror. so my nose will probably be purple by tomorrow. which means i'm going to kill Taylor -_-

 

you ever done a Chinese Fire Drill?

Jake quit Aiden. boo =/ i wonder why. he was a pretty nice guy. but that's not the exciting news. So i just came back from watching the second Narnia(which was awesome), and during the previews, i found out.............

 

THE CITY OF EMBER IS GOING TO BECOME A MOVIE!

 

have you read it? where there's a city located underground? i read the series in middle school and loved them to death. and now it's going to be a movie! i'm so excited!

have you read it?

i would know.

i got two today, and one tomorrow.

apparently, they think that giving me shots for everything under the sun will somehow miracuously save me from the fact that i have a tired little immune system. my right arm's feeling pretty good, but my left arm, where i got the TDAP booster, is throbbing like no other.

EEEP!

 

have you had any not-so-nice shot expieriences?

how often i change my look.

sometimes i look like a completely different person.

which is really odd.

cos i'm def. ONE person.

 

 

Alesana was nips (NEW WORD! nips=rad hahah i love dave) we met all of them. i was talking to their bassist, shane, before the show, and i was like "good luck! don't mess up!" and what do you know, during their first song, his slits his nose open on a cymbal and had to be rushed to the hospital. how that happened, i'm not entirely sure. i feel like i jinxed him =/

but, how are you guys?